tHe sCiEnCe oF mArIz

Nope, I don’t have a terminal disease but just this morning I realized that I’ve been wasting my time NOT doing the things I’ve always wanted to do. SO, I’m listing it all down to sort of, well, remind me. Here goes.

1. Learn how to shoot ala Angelina Jolie in Wanted.
Nah, just kidding. I just wanna hit a bull’s eye in the comforts of the firing range. Guess this is my pathetic way of trying to live up to my DREAM of being a literal and figurative tough laaa-dy. But hey, I heard it’s a good stress reliever and “anti-depressant” so I’m thinking this will be a welcome addition to my usual chocolate and coffee anti-stress fix.

2.Become a certified scuba diver and take kick-ass underwater photos
The beach and the oceans’ certain lure to me is perhaps one of the reasons why I want to become a certified scuba diver and take kick-ass underwater photos. But really, it’s just simple. I want to go underwater, digitally record all the beauty I’ll see, and take every opportunity to share it to the entire world.

3.Explore Vigan/Pagudpod on my own.
Actually, I’m not very particular on the city. I just wanna travel and experience the challenge of exploring an unknown territory on my own.

4.Travel around Greece and/or Venice, Italy.
Ex-flame told me I am a very weird girl because I don’t have a dream wedding. I told him I’m not weird because I’d rather have a VERY simple wedding (with just my closest relatives and friends in attendance) and go to my dream honeymoon destination – Greece and/ or Venice, Italy. If I can’t do that for my honeymoon, then I’d save every penny to do this later on in life.Haha!

5.Look into a person’s eyes and know that it’s for keeps. (… and of course have kids and be the best mom ever. )
Since I think I already had my fair share of heartbreaks, can I now look into someone’s eyes, and see “forever” and all that mushy stuff they say? Lol. :-)
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"Importante ang balance and timing, Mariz. You gotta learn how to adjust the fulcrum when you feel the pressure on one side." – Miguel the Greatest

Darn. I’m not kidding when I say I dig smart men.

Peace, Miggy. Haha! :-)

Yup, I can confirm --- you really do get bits and pieces of life-lessons from the oddest places. Like when you’re in the middle of a Client meeting, or when you’re in your FX stop, and even when you’re all alone in a coffee shop, draining all the days’ worth of stress away.

And I guess you learn faster this way. It’s either you weren’t too pre-occupied with anything else that you get to “digest” it right away, or it was recorded and you get to be reminded of it when you do your contact report.

For whatever it’s worth, you just gotta make yourself REALLY learn from it. Otherwise, you’ll have to go through all the arduous process, and experience all the being-caught-off-guard-moments, all the ego-busting scenarios and even all that pain all over again. And of course, you don’t want that, do you?
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While I did have shaky moments with work early this week, not to mention that I had a huge fight with one of my best friends, I still do have a lot of things to be thankful for:
1. Surviving a pre-prod meeting, a strat presentation and work per se while nursing a fever.
2. Finally getting a hang of the ins and outs of my new account.
3. Discovering zucchini and how to cook it.
4. Adopting Wilda, Andrei’s new handy-dandy wide angle lens.
5. Having Loren, my ever-reliable AE.
-and, of course-
6. Learning new lessons every friggin day.
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“This is like… what is Richard without Tennis?” – Nestor Constancia

Okay. Let me take back what I just said.

I’m sad.
I’m sad.
I’m sad.

Why, you ask? Maybe… just maybe… it’s because I realized that what I’m doing is just plain silly.

Hay.

I’m happy.
I’m happy.
I’m happy.

Maybe it’s because there’s a flicker of hope somewhere in the horizon. But I can’t really rely on that because afterall it is just a morsel of possibility which may end up being too far from reality. Still, a hope is a hope is a hope. And if it’s something that can me make look forward to every single morning, then let it stay there to cut above the inevitable redundancies in my life.

Yeehaw.

Writing still has its peculiar magic. It remains as my firm grip to sanity and my quick escape from reality. I know I promised I won’t write obscure stuff anymore but I just know you guys would understand because, well, it made me feel better. :-)
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I think I’m gonna head to the bowling alley at least once a week til the company bowling tournament in September. Just that after embarrassing myself in front of Oya Joey, Ate Laine and Gian last Saturday, I told myself I don’t want to risk my rep in front of my officemates too. Lol!
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Boring peeps, give me a holler. Haven’t seen you in a long while and I just miss miss miss y’all. *Hugs.

I found out that there’s a very thin line separating happiness from agony. One minute you’re happy then you’ll be depressed the next. Weird but I guess that’s part of the roller coaster life experience that we humans are all treading. And we have no choice. Perhaps the realization that not everything turns up roses teaches us to appreciate the sweetest things in life.

It’s about the same funny feeling that you get when you sense like there are butterflies in your stomach at about the same time that a huge brick seem to lump on your chest.

But this is something I’ve always wanted so I’m gonna hold on to it tight even if it hurts, even it makes my hands bleed. I dunno know if this is the right way to do it. But I know no other way. My heart’s gonna explode any minute but I don’t care. If it makes me happy, then maybe… JUST MAYBE… it’s gonna be worth all the anxiety, all the agony, and even all the tears.

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“If you know God is your Father, then you know that He won’t keep you lonely for the rest of your life.” – Arla Fontamillas

After ranting on things that make me really sad and tired…

Chuck: When you say things like that, I feel sad.
Mariz: Why? Is it because ***?
Chuck: No. Kasi you’re a poster child for positive thinking. When you give up, it truly isn’t possible.

Hay. I miss this boi so much.

Sometimes I envy Bubi because he can go on with his life without having to worry about the things around him. He does not have to care if he’ll be regarded as selfish or inconsiderate because he has his own little world to concentrate on. Everybody knows he’s a self-centered brat but he (almost) always gets away with it. Hay.
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Someday, someone/something will take me out of this misery.

Check out who’s blabbing for the heck of updating her blog.
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An unreliable source told me that the best bloggers in town are those who only know how to write about the good things in life - That the most widely read sites are that of people who know how to have fun and share their exciting experiences to people online.

If these were true, I can only guess. But for the heck of it, I’m currently raking my brain for “fun” things that happened in my life over the past, err, months to sort of make up for the long-time blog hiatus.

Then again, “this” is a challenge in itself because as far as I can remember, highlights in every single day pretty much consist of the words “approved,” “ready for seeding,” and “good morning(at six in the evening).”

But yeah, Bohol (and Cebu) is one, Lago is two and the rest are pretty much random Friday/Saturday night outs with friends.

So how have I really been the past few months? Busy, yes. But in totality, I’ve actually never been happier.

^_^

Nuff said.

A voice from a far away land said “I’m sorry, I was a jerk. Can we go back to square one?” Because it came in a daze, the girl just shut the phone off and pretended she didn’t hear a thing. Oh no, she can’t go back to square one again. Not now, not ever.